By David Reay
Scene 1. A running club committee meeting.
I think we should hold a new race.
Good idea. How about a road race or a trail race.
What! That’s for softies, we should make them run on sand. Further the better.
Fair enough. Whitley Bay has a nice beach, very pleasant.
What! That’s for softies. We need a beach with lots of obstacles, some of which you can’t climb over. And a steep slope into the sea so you can’t run properly. We can use Blyth beach.
Yes but there’s a big river in the middle. We would have to route the run onto a bridge.
What! That’s for softies. We want people to wade through deep, fast flowing, ice cold water; with luck some of the smaller, lighter runners will be washed away. Teach them to eat more chips.
Well, that’s settled. When do we hold this? Everyone will get very wet so perhaps we should hold it in July.
What! That’s for softies. Waste of sun screen. Let’s do it in December.
And we can call it Blyth Sands.
Postscript. Once you recover, a super race. Coffee, port (yes really) and mince pies at the end.